It’s been an interesting week. There I was sitting chatting to my best friend on Saturday at 6 weeks 4 days, who I’ve told that I’m pregnant, saying how I have had a pretty easy ride so far. I told her I have nausea but as long as I eat it goes away.
Then Monday morning arrives. I wake up at 4.30am gagging whilst waving my hubby off for a school trip which he had to get up ridiculously early for. I eat a packet of crisps and attempt to go back to sleep, thinking that should do the trick. I wake up at half 8 ready to start work at 9 (from home – I always work at home Mondays- what a sweet deal!) and I feel SOOO sick. Like SOOO sick. I just want to lie down and not move, any movement makes me gag. I run to the loo and puke up all my breakfast. I eat something else and run back and throw it all up again, including the water I have just drunk.
I called my mum. I told her this is obviously the start of bad morning sickness, the type that you can’t go to work on. You just can’t. I was 6 weeks 5 days, and according to the ‘average’ woman who has morning sickness it stops at 12-13 weeks. I moaned to my mum down the phone that I am going to have to miss so much work, at the same time as I am asking for a pay rise – not a good situation!
She asked if there was something the doctors could do. I said “…well there is stuff you can give you but I think you have to be sick for weeks to even get it, it’s not just something I can ask for after 1 day of bad sickness!”. Anyway, I phoned the doctor presuming she would say try natural remedies for a few weeks, see how it goes then call her again. Instead, she simply prescribed me anti-sickness medication straight away, 50 tablets. So that was easy! I went to pick it up and had Tuesday off work because I was nervous about whether it would work or not.
It took about a day to kick in, so I was glad of the day off, but it definitely works. I feel ok most of the time. I take 3 a day, but have to time it so carefully as each pill only lasts about 6 hours. The last hour I often feel it wearing off and feel quite sick, but then I know it’s time to take another one. So I am getting through the days at work ok. The only time it is really awful is if I wake up in the night, as I don’t have enough pills prescribed per day to be able to take one at night – so when I wake up it is my natural state and how I would feel without the pills, which is pretty awful! On a scale of 1-10, if 10 would be just about to puke and 1 just very mild nausea, then I am around an 8 when I wake up. I feel like a 3-4 on the pills. When the pill wears off I am on about a 6.
Anyway, I’m not moaning here. I know it sounds as if I am – but I don’t actually care that I am sick, it’s a good sign for me. I know that lots of people would freak out about me taking anti-sickness pills, but I honestly don’t see why someone wouldn’t. I don’t see why you would wait weeks and weeks of vomiting and not get them if they are available to you. The pills are completely safe for the baby, they block a signal in my brain that tells me to vomit, which has nothing to do with my baby. What is definitely NOT good for my baby is puking up everything I drink or eat and ending up in hospital.
Saying that, I can already feel that mother-needing-to-defend-my-choices gripe creeping up on me, and to be honest I don’t want to be like that. I hate those kind of people on Facebook! Please God let me not be one of those “I am a brilliant mum my child is the world and my little Jimmy couldn’t put a toe out of line, you can’t tell me what to do” people!. I vow to be open, accept my child is sinful from day 1 because we all are, and not be blinded my complete selfishness myself. If there is anything that infertility problems have taught me it’s that children are not the be all and end all in life, that you think it will make you complete and it won’t, and it will be a rewarding but hard road that I will need God’s help in every step of the way.
Right now its a Thursday afternoon at work. My mum got the train to London today as Tom is away this week. We are going out for dinner tonight (I am meeting her after I finish work) and then I have the day off tomorrow to spend with her. So excited!